teamwork

apparently
i play for maybe two teams

my team
that consists of me
and this other stupidfuckingteamineveraskedtobeapartof

the "lesbian" team

im not gay. im not a dyke. im not a lezzzzzzbian. and im absolutely not straight.

im myself.
im me.
how many times have those two words been placed together to form some sort of strong meaningful statement.
the desire to be different has become the same.
unique is now a category all in itself. and theres TONS of ppl in it.

so.
reader.
when i say this.
i mean this.
i am me.
i am on my own team.
im my own coach
umpplayerinfieldoutfieldpitchercatcher
uptobat
andondeck

notice i havent said "labels"
until just now.
because when i say i hate labels. i mean i HATE labels.
-end of label rant

so 23 years and counting... ive played for the same team.
never changes, but slightly alters.

ive introduced new players, benched them almost immediately.
because i am the star of the game.
thislifeisnothingbutagame
its up to "us" as a "society" (society = another "unique" group of ppl)
to decide whether this game is going to be fun or not.

ok so
playing on this team by myself.
refusing to represent any other individual
only because all i know is myself and if i were to try to partner up indefinitely with some one else.... id try very hard, daily, hourly to make them see through my eyes.
when do you realize that not everything is entirely possible.
for example: two ppl can look at the exact same thing, and yet see two completely different things.

things being the key word here

because whatever we are both staring at.. is just a thing.
thingsthingsthings.

so who decides what this thing is?
whofuckingcares

right?!

so i dont play for anyone else's team. i represent nobody but myself.
its not giving up. its called peace.

innerpeace.

x